
Our Integrated Scars
I had a scar on my knee from when I was about five or six years old. It was just always there—until it wasn’t. Somehow, my body modeled and remodeled itself until the scar was gone. I didn’t notice when it happened; I just looked one day, and it had disappeared.
The same thing happened with the emotional scar from when my brother died. I was 28, and he was only 32. That wound was far deeper and took much longer to heal. The remodeling came through living, through the slow, steady work of being human and finding my way forward. One day, I realized I could think of him, and it didn’t hurt anymore. Over about 20 years, that scar had softened and faded until what remained were the good memories — the love, not the loss.
This weekend, I’m at a retreat on the East Coast providing Counterstrain therapy for a group of women who are survivors of sexual assault. The pain they carry runs deeper still because it comes with betrayal and violence. And yet, these women show up to do the work of reintegrating those scars, so they can move forward without the constant ache.
Many Ways to Heal
There are many ways to heal. This experience doesn’t involve plant medicine, it’s about human medicine. The medicine here comes from presence, from the “doulas” who help guide participants through a journey to find the parts of themselves that were left behind after trauma. It’s no less powerful.
The courage it takes to show up for this kind of healing is remarkable. Some women aren’t sure if they’re ready. Others are pounding on the door, saying, “Hell yeah, I’m ready.” Either way, their journeys begin, or continue, in this space. At its core, it’s all about hope. The hope of being whole again. The refusal to give up.
And maybe one day, like me, they’ll notice, the pain is gone. Strength, softness, and the quiet knowing that healing doesn’t mean forgetting replaces the pain. Healing means reclaiming the parts of ourselves that were waiting to be found again. Healing leaves its own kind of mark. Here, the emotional healing is not the raised edges of a scar, it is our integrated scars. The gentle contours of a life that has been felt, grieved, and finally, made whole again.
Don’t give up.
Be well,
Kristin
Have a question for me?
Reach out at hello@meridianpassagewellness.com. Want a consult with me? Click here to schedule a one-on-one. I am a licensed Naturopathic Doctor and LAc offering medical care in Washington State. Additionally, I offer coaching services and case consults to those outside of Washington.
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